Thank You 2019 for Everything!

If anyone asks me to explain 2019 in one word, I would say “Beautiful”. The year started with a bang and is ending with a bang. That’s what makes 2019 the beautiful year it was. I think so far, this has been the best year of my life. Not because of one reason but multiple events combined to make this year the most special that it is, and I will always look back and cherish the days I have spent.

It started with me trying to find a place in a completely new work environment and handling new profile. I never expected I would do so well in my new work profile that I would be asked by the management to represent the organization on a global platform. I never expected that within a month of my joining, I will be representing the organization in a global conference. The year started with my first ever international trip to Colombia, South America where I tried public speaking for the first time, and it was amazing. I was nervous for sure but the fact that I have come a long way gave me the confidence to put things into perspective and give a session on Communication Strategies.

Bogota, as a city, was amazing and beautiful in its own way. Roaming alone on the streets of Bogota, continents away from my home, was a satisfying feeling and I remember I felt at peace. If this part was beautiful, what came next was something emotional for me.

My debut book launch. I had tears in my eyes on August 19, 2019, when my debut novel Shadow of the Past went live online and across all leading bookstores in India. I had waited for this moment all my life. From the day, I decided to become a writer to the day I became one I had always imagined these moments in the theatre of my head and when I was living my dream it was something beautiful and emotional at the same time.

I could have never asked for anything more from life other than allowing me to wander into the unknown and live my dream. I know now how it feels when you live your dream. How you feel when your dreams turn into reality. The energy that you feel within you resonates at the same frequency of this universe and this gives you the confidence and the courage to keep moving forward and achieve much more!

It was in the year 2010 when I had decided that I want to become a writer. Back then, I was not as polished as I am today for sure, but I had this dream. Suddenly, I realized that I have this ability to tell a story. But I was afraid about what others may think, how people would laugh at me for this silly thought and I didn’t know how to face my parents who were expecting another engineer in the family. But I kept these thoughts aside and decided to write a book.

I wrote my first book “Life’s Unpredictable” in 2012. It received 19 rejections and never got published. Many publishers told me to come up with a love story because “Life’s Unpredictable” was a dark story about life and not many people would like to read something like this coming from a young author like me. 

I feel I was not ready to become a writer back then. I stopped writing for the next two years and decided to focus on my studies. It was a terrible idea though but then there are times when you realize that maybe people who said you were chasing impossible were right or maybe I was not destined to become a writer and I was maybe living in a bubble which I had to break and see the reality.

But thanks to the placement drive and the 20 back-to-back rejections I faced. This made me realize what I really wanted from my life and how badly I wanted to change the direction of my ship. Amid all this, I told my parents about my dream and asked them to give me one last chance and I will never disappoint them. Since then I have never looked back. I have only marched forward.

I joined a journalism school in Delhi in 2014, and since then the journey has been beautiful. Yes, there were a lot of ups and downs. I am not saying that every day of these past 5 years was beautiful. There were many days when I was shattered, broken and lost and there were many instances when I felt defeated by life. But what I didn’t do or can say did differently this time was I continued moving forward without caring about the world.

This finally helped me to get my first book contract in 2017 and since then I have been waiting for the day when my book will be out, and people would read and tell me how they feel about it. This year, this turned into reality and everything that I had imagined in the theatre of my head was happening right in front of my eyes.

The cherry on top in my case was my decision of moving to Bangalore, which I was trying to do from the past two years but somehow things were not in my favours. But this year, even that became a reality. Bangalore has always been quite close to my heart. I was born here. I am not a Kannadiga. I am from Bihar, but my heart belongs to Bangalore. And now, when I am here, I think 2019 has been generous to me despite all the hard times. In the end, what matters is how far have you reached.

It has been four months since my book went live and I cannot complain. Life has been good. Definitely, a roller-coaster ride with a lot of ups and downs but what matters more is when you reach the place you always wanted to reach. That feeling is unmatchable.

Every day, when I wake up and I see reviews of my book, messages from readers or sometimes getting recognized publicly (rarely), it fills my heart with immense happiness and peace. I cannot ask for anything more. But I also understand that this is just the beginning and from here on the real journey begins and I have to do a lot and achieve much more. 

I also feel it is important to sometimes take a pause and reflect on what you have done and pat yourself on your back for making through the tough times and sailing through the rough sea to being patient amid the storm of life. 

For all the scars life and people gave you, for all the things that crushed you from within but yet you continued your journey to be what you always wanted to be, you have to take a step back and express gratitude to the world, to life, to universe, to people who helped you throughout or supported you endlessly but most importantly, you need to thank yourself for doing what was necessary. We don’t thank ourselves, but we should.

We are always busy in making others happy and we often forget to keep ourselves happy. You need to fill your bucket first, let it overflow and then you will be able to give. If your bucket is empty or half-filled, then you cannot give it to anyone.

And on this last day of 2019, I am taking a pause from my busy life and thanking this beautiful year for all the things it gave me and for all the hard times because, at the end of the day, life is nothing but a bundle of experiences and it makes you a better human if you learn from mistakes and continue to march forward to achieve what you want to. You are invincible and you can achieve anything only if you set your mind and heart to it. It won’t be easy. It will be difficult. Life will test you at every signal and sometimes it will tear you apart but then you have to dust yourself, get up and keep moving forward. And a day will come when you will feel that peace you have been longing for from a long time.

With a lot more to come in 2020 and to many more experiences in life, I put my fingers to rest. Thank you 2019 for giving me my best moments which I am going to cherish all my life for sure! Wish you all a Happy New Year!!!! Live your dream.