I was talking to one of my
closest friend; she was very upset about the way her relationship was going.
She knew the fact that her relationship is not going anywhere still she was
sailing through it. No wonder she has to face all those miseries. People often
ask me, what is love? The fact is no one in this world knows exactly what love
is all about. If they knew then everything would have been perfect in their
life. But since everything has a loophole, so it is when it comes to love.
People live their whole life with this misconception that love happens once in
a lifetime, how it can happen once I always ask myself. We love our parents,
our siblings, our friends so how does it happens only once in our lifetime?
People have this habit of complicating their own life and then cry over it. But
they often forget the fact that because of their deeds they are in any kind of
situation. If they happens to be in a good situation then they are responsible
for it, and for all the miseries they blame others. How we can forget the fact
that we are the creator and destroyer of our own life. How people can blame
someone for their own misery? Love is still a mystery which no one has been
ever able to understand or unveil. They give their own theories and whichever
theory we think defines the current situation of our life, we start believing
in it. Why can’t we just give our own theory like so many others? People who
made those theories were not the creator of this world, then why we believe in
them blindly? Instead of blaming others for our misery why can’t we accept the
fact that actually we are not that capable to cope up with the situation and so
we always land up in such deep troubles? She told me that when she came into
this relationship then that time, she was unaware that it would get so serious,
and that’s the mistake most of us do. We talk to someone, we start liking them,
we ask them out, we feel good to be in their company and without giving it a
thought we end up proposing them. If it gets rejected we spend our life behind
it either mourning or trying for it until we find someone better. If it gets
accepted then we devote our whole life to make that relationship work out, we
compromise with our lives, our dreams, our needs to fulfill their needs and now
we are more concerned about what they want from their life instead of what we
want from our life. We start caring for that person so much that we forget to
think about our own life. If that person is happy we are happy and if that
person is sad we become sad. What bullshit is this? Who gave these theories?
Who made such rules? No one, it’s us who blindly believe in all such things.
It’s not like I have not experienced all such things in life, I have a great
experience and what I learnt from it was, whatever happens in our life, we are
solely responsible for it.
The reason why relationships
doesn’t work out is because when we get into any relationship instead of start
spending time with that person all we talk and think about is our marriage
prospect, our future planning’s. We never met that person, we are friends
through some social networking site, we exchange numbers, start talking for
hours and hours and then we start planning our kids even before getting
married, forget marriage even before meeting each other people start planning
their kids. Isn’t this the most ridiculous thing to do?
Someone told me a very good thing
which I remember very clearly, satisfy your own needs before satisfying others
need. Because if you are busy satisfying other people needs instead of our own
self then sooner or later you will start regretting many things in your life.
And we always think that it’s too late to act we end up spending our whole life
with that regret. Life is a compromise but not on the cost of your dreams and
goals. You spend half of your life behind something which you wanted it
desperately and now just because your partner doesn’t like you doing it, you
stop working for it. You stop living your own dream, it fades away in one shot
and you start doing those things which they want you to do. Why? Who the hell
anyone is to govern your own life? Who the hell are you to govern someone’s
life? Once you satisfy yourself, you do what you always wanted to do then only
you can satisfy others. You cannot compromise on your dreams for those people
who are temporarily there in your life. Once you get married then you have to
compromise in many aspects but then as I said nothing can be perfect.
If you think that your
relationship isn’t going anywhere, take a stand and just let it go. You don’t
have to feel bad even for once because you didn’t ditch that person; you
allowed them to get what they really deserve in their life. Life is tough, but
we can make it easy. When we are in relationship, that person becomes very
special for us, we tag them as the only love of our life and when things
doesn’t go well, somehow they end up breaking up with each other, then the same
person who was everything becomes nothing in a matter of few days? Who are we
fooling? We are just fooling ourselves and nothing else. If anything good is
going in our life then we often say that’s because I have the love of my life
with me at every point, how is that even possible? Whatever you are that’s
because you did something for it, not that your lover came and did everything
for you. Kick out this notion from your head, live a real life, you are not
fooling others you are just fooling yourselves. Doesn’t matter how rough is the
situation; it’s never too late to act. How you can give up the dream of your
life for someone who arrived a while ago in your life? And who knows whether
they will be there with you or not and even if they are why you have to give up
your own dream.
Think about it…