When you meet Isolation…

There comes a time when the world doesn’t exist for you. A time comes when nothing seems familiar, when you want to get underground for a time being. A time comes when you don’t want anyone around you. A time comes when you want to be completely alone, all by yourself. But this materialistic world won’t even let you do that. Behind everything they have their own personal agenda. No one actually cares what you want; people just tend to impose things on you. If you are smart enough you move aside but you are one emotional fool then it’s easy to fool you. And you become the victim. And when you become the victim you start cursing around. You curse God, your friends, loved ones and in the end you end up blaming yourself for being fooled. Then what? You have two choices: either you get isolated or be what you are. Stick to the rules you made earlier. But what you get in return, pain in either way. You are the one who will be on the suffering side. When the world kept on chanting and yelling in your ear, that don’t expect things from anyone apart from yourself then you didn’t believe it. But when you saw it happening around you, then you were shattered. You feel like a stranger now, amidst of all the people who seemed familiar to you a while ago. You start counting things you did for people, like waiting for them at the bus stop; teaching them a night before the exam, giving your notes, saving your lunch for them, planning an outing such that everyone becomes a part of it. You do it because you feel that it is your responsibility to do that. That’s what we do right, live a selfless life in a selfish world. When you had a choice to become selfish you chose the latter option, and now you regret. Even now if you try to be one of them you can’t because you have lived a life so far with a different attitude. It’s hard to bring a completely different attitude in between out of nowhere. The reason behind this being simple, you don’t want to upset your soul. Because if it happens with you that you turn into one of those people then you will never have a peace of mind. So now you can’t change everything, so you lose whatever you earned so far. And then you move on, because you think that’s the best thing to do. And life is all about moving on. But why life is all about moving on? What about those relations that you earned? Do they have any meaning? If not then why it was so crucial for you? And if they have a meaning then instead of working things out why we always run away from the fact. Later on we label that phase as, something which was not in our fate. If everything was depended on fate then why you go on to people and lent a hand to help? Why you make friends? Why you go to someone whom you like and ask for a date? Because now you start believing in something, you start believing in karma which is on a parallel line with fate. And somehow you try to make a connection between them that if your karma is good then you end up witnessing the magic of fate. But both of them are two different things. Fate is something which is inevitable and karma is something which leads things to happen. Fate may not change but karma changes with your deeds. That’s what our mythology says and so says the world. But still we mix both of them up and make a whole new thing.

Since our childhood days, we have learnt that everything in this world has two faces: head or tail, good or bad, angel or demon. But we are always unaware of the third face of this world, which is the worst of them all. And that is being neutral, if you are more on one side it is good for other people to deal with you. But if you are being neutral then you are unpredictable and you end up hurting everyone around you, even then you are not even bothered about it. All you think about is the situation where life is easy for you. The good trait always leads us to something good and the bad part always leads us to something bad. But the phase between these two changes the world of other people upside-down, and they can’t even blame anyone because they don’t know that there is a third face of this world which exists in real. I name it, the devastating phase.

So what we can conclude here now? I don’t know if I am making any sense or not. As we grow up we should stop depending on others. Walk alone if you have to, because no one will be taking up your responsibility, no one will be bothered to greet you if you don’t earn well and no one will be sharing your death bed. Stay aloof if you have to, because you will never regret the time that you spend with yourself. Life gives us few dots; it’s our choice how we connect them. And what price we pay while connecting those dots to complete a life worth living.

"So far what I have learnt about life is, when you starting expecting things from anyone it screws you even more. It’s better to stay aloof rather than being somewhere where you don't even exist."

I Praise Your Kindness Lord…

When things didn’t work out,

You always stood beside me.

When I felt helpless,

You lent a helping hand to me.

When dark clouds hovered around,

You were the one who took me out of it.

When I was lonely,

It was you who filled the empty space for me.

Oh Lord! I thank you for being there,

 And for bestowing your kindness upon me.

I praise your kindness lord,

And the love that I got from you…

I’m 21, let’s get married…

We are in 21^st century, the era where development is at its peak in all aspects of life. People are more educated than earlier. But still there is something which never leaves us. It follows us like our shadow, even in broad daylight. Although many things have changed with time, but our mentality is still stucked there. Recently I have come across news about many people who gets married or who wants to get married once they are done with their graduation. Particularly in Gujarat, the place where businessmen are born, there the basic mentality of people is once I’m 21 let’s get married. People may say what’s wrong in that because according to the law our government gives us the flexibility to get married at the age of 21 for boys and 18 for girls. Does that mean we should forget about everything else and get married? Marriage is a big thing in one’s life and to lead a happy married life (seldom that happens now) one needs to be mature both physically and mentally. Do you think a 21 year old boy is ready to take such big responsibilities? Someone who has not even tasted the rationality which this life shows us ties himself into a lifetime responsibility, when he is not even able to support himself he takes up the responsibility of being a husband. And two-three years down the line they end up having a kid. I am not against marriage but marrying at an early age doesn’t make any sense to me. Most of them are kids of businessman so later on after their graduation they start looking after their dad’s business, doesn’t matter whether they want to do it or not. In most cases they are forced to because now they have a wife to look after which doesn’t give them a chance to experiment anything else in their life. So what is the meaning of such life where marriage is your only concern? What about those dreams that you used to live during your school and college times? What about those plan that you planned meticulously in those sleepless nights? What about your identity? How you are gonna explain to your children to chase your dream when you don’t know anything about it. And hence this cycle goes on. On one side we talk about big big things while on the other we are still stucked in those peculiar old times thoughts.

For guys they still have a chance to start afresh and achieve their dream. But what about those girls who are locked between the four walls of house stucked up in household chores? What about their dream and their identity? Whole life they end up working their ass off to keep someone happy. And after all their efforts people still complain. In some places they are not even allowed to wear what they feel like wearing. And the household work keeps on increasing exponentially as time passes. And one day the family pressurizes them to have a baby. If they protest then all those emotional drama is on and somehow they are convinced that after marriage having a baby is the only thing left. And once that happens whole life passes by in a blink.

The reason why this is still happening is because one, they don’t have the courage they stand for themselves and two; they are not exposed to the different parts of life. They just know one thing that they have to look after their dad’s business. Even if they wanted to become a doctor, engineer, singer, and writer all such dreams have no space in those places.

According to me, I think the marriageable age should be after 25 years. You could do something in your life which would define you for the rest of your life. You can handle those real time life problems. So that you are mature enough to understand people. You don’t end up having a divorce or a fucked up married life. Earlier when these use to happen back then things were entirely different. The way of life was different. People never had such facilities and technologies as we have now. People never had so many things to do unlike now. And so they used to get married early. But now things have changed drastically and we should always change with time, then only our time will change according to us. Marriage is not like a tissue paper that you use it and throw away. Once you get into it there is no running away because it’s a big responsibility which connects two people, which brings two families together. And to understand that one must face the anomalies of life.

People would say that this is bullshit; things are not like this anymore. But trust me it is. People are getting married at an early age and within a year of their marriage they start regretting about it when they see their friends doing something out of the box in life and they are stucked up in such responsibilities. Think about it. And if you realize this then think twice before getting married. Ask yourselves whether you are ready for it or not. Because there is a good saying, “if you don’t satisfy your need you can’t satisfy anyone else”.

Fill your tank then only you can fill someone else tank. 

Who says, "Pappu can't dance saala...?"

Since my childhood I have been a Pappu when it comes to dance. I never danced in my life. The reason behind this being simple, firstly I don’t know how to dance and secondly I am way too shy to move my bums in front of everyone. And when the DJ party was planned in our resort when we were in Goa I was clueless what I am gonna do there. You ask me to cook I will do that. You ask me to write something I will pour out my heart in front of you. You even ask me to sing I would even do that even though you never wish that to happen. But dancing is just not my cup of tea. Forget tea not even a cup of coffee in my case. And so I always picture myself in the song Pappu can’t dance saala from the movie Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na. I was sitting inside my room and hoping that I get some reason to escape this part of the trip but seldom that happens. What you always want to escape you end up being its first victim. And the same happened. The party kicked off while I was still in my room. And then the faculty who was accompanying us for the trip came to my room and dragged me literally to the dance floor. While I was climbing up the stairs my mind was doing a bit of rehearsal because I knew I can’t escape from this anymore. And when I entered into the lounge I don’t know what exactly happened to me. The ambience was amazing like a proper DJ night, truly kick ass and there was energy flowing around from everyone present there. Everyone gave me a smile when I walk past them and joined them on the dance floor. Something was there which gave me the exact feeling to come out of my shyness and rock the dance floor. When I don’t do something I just don’t do it. But when I do something I do it very seriously. And for the next two hours I danced. The moves were coming naturally with every track. People of my class never saw me dancing in past three years and that night I danced with everyone who was present there. The energy level was superb and I didn’t feel anything in those two hours. The sweat, the strain, the tiredness everything didn’t seem to exist there till the time the party was on. And if there is a better way to put it, we burned the damn dance floor. And since that night I am finding a reason to dance. I have overcome my shyness and now I am ready for another amazing night like that. This time I don’t need someone to give me a push to the dance floor, I will be already there. 

Who says now, “Pappu can’t dance saala”

Whatever happens, it happens for a reason…

Few days before when I jotted down the post of my blog, “Tears that was shed for you…” I was not aware of the reason behind it. I was not aware of the fact that I will be writing its continuation few days down the line. When the trip was finalized it clashed with the dates of her birthday. And when I told her about it she got upset and it gave me my post “Tears that was shed for you…”. But only a day after that night our trip got cancelled due to some placement issues. And it was confirmed that it wasn’t happening this semester again. There was no trip coming up till next semester. And next semester also there was very slight chances of organizing any college trip. When many were upset and were mourning I was overjoyed as I got a chance to celebrate her birthday for the first time since we got together. Maybe her wish has been answered. But on the cost of so many people’s happiness didn’t seem fair to me. However I put this thought aside and enjoyed the day with her. But I couldn’t keep this thought out of my head any longer. And with time I was more curious. I often asked God, why this happened? Is it fair to fulfill one person wish crushing over so many people happiness? And three days later I got my answer. If you don’t believe in the supreme power above us whom we call God then start believing in it. Not because if you believe then something miraculous will happen. But the reason being simple, it’s all about faith. And three days later our trip was again into the picture, this time the idea was initiated by our faculty. Tickets were booked instantly, hotels were arranged and when the itinerary of the trip came again into my hand I got all my answers. The reason was, initially the trip was cancelled so that I could enjoy her birthday with her that she wanted truly from her heart. And the reason why it was planned again was as I said earlier; it’s not fair to fulfill a person’s wish on the cost of so many people happiness. And when I saw those delighted faces I felt good and worthy. When everyone was upset and I was overjoyed deep within I felt guilty for being like that. But the day when it happened again I looked up at sky and thanked God for giving us one more chance which seldom we get in life. So whatever happens, it happens for a reason. And in the end everything just falls back to its right places…

We die… In the quest of living one’s dream…

Left alone in the vicinity of his solitude, he lay down on the concrete floor of his building terrace. The stars were twinkling bright. The clouds moved with the wind. The moon played hide and seek as the cool breeze gained its momentum. It gave him the moment of peace that he has been longing for. He kept his phone away from himself. He wanted to be alone. In past few months his life has picked up a pace, he wasn’t even able to give some time to himself. It was very late at night; he wasn’t even bothered to check the time. Past three years of college passed by in a blink. He was clueless about what he did in this past three years of his college life. And in another a month or two, he would face several interviews. He wasn’t even sure whether he was ready for the life which was only a year ahead or not. These days money has become an important priority for everyone that their dreams are fading away.

“Is there even a need to dream?” he reflected

People don’t do things which define them. They don’t go for things which make them happy and feel alive. Instead they have inherited a habit of beating around the bush behind making wads and wads of money. They don’t see this way that if they conquer the quest of living one’s dream then money would follow certainly. But they think that life is a race and in this race they are so busy they don’t have time for themselves. Every human is so tied-up with several priorities that they don’t have a life. In short they are living a fucked up life. You wake up, go for work, come back, eat and then sleep. And the same routine is followed until they get retired from their work thinking they will travel around the world with their children. But they often forget that the whole beating around the bush concept that they had left, continues to screw the lives of their children and they complain. They complain about everything when one fine day they are on their death bed. Then what next??? A blank screen as you close your eyes and get drown in the arms of death.

What is the use of a life which we get only once? Are we born only because we have to make loads of money? What is the meaning of our existence in this world? And when death is only the permanent thing then, why we have a life? Has anyone ever taught us about living our dream? Why we have to become a rebel in the quest of chasing our own dream? Why we spend a lifetime doing things that we don’t want to do? Has ever anyone inspired us to go for our dream?

And when we talk about our dream with anyone, instead of encouraging us that we have realized the reason for our existence in this world they start giving long lectures on how immature our dream is, how we are wasting our time behind all this which seems very impractical to them. Then I ask you one thing, if one’s dream is impractical then, are those people who succeeded in living their dream belongs to some other species? Are they not human? Then why so many questions we have to answer? Why people have an opinion about everything? Why they don’t want to live their life for themselves? And if someone does they make their life living hell.

Idea of living a secured life is good but not on the cost of your dream. We spend our whole childhood and teenage dreaming about something we want to become in life. And those dreams are washed away when we get a reality check and come back to the reality when life shows its rationality. Instead of brooding over it after getting old why don’t we take chances now? You never know you might end up living your dream. And when you succeed in living your own dream then one fine day people will get inspired from you, from the deeds that you did. And you will be remembered as a person who lived his dream. Atleast when you will be at the door of your death, you won’t be having any regrets.

Live now because it’s now or never.

Live free!!! Die hard!!!

Tears… that was shed for you…

It was during lunch hour when he got the news. The news that brought joy for many people in his class though it freaked him out. He calculated the number of days repeatedly in his mind. And he knew it then, he won’t be able to be here on her birthday.

“It’s okay if you don’t come on my birthday, we will celebrate it when you are back from your trip.” She had said that the day he told her he might be going for his college trip. That day she had consoled him and insisted him to join this trip.

But deep within he was confused what to do. One part of his mind wanted him to go for this trip as this was his final year in college but the other part wanted him to stay back as this was the first time they will be together on her birthday. But it was practically impossible for him to stay back as this trip was mandatory for everyone. And the fact that he was made the coordinator of this trip didn’t give him any chance to evade from this trip. He was in a dilemma after a long time. It was a time when he had to make a choice.

“I will explain my situation, I’m sure she will understand.” He said to himself

After his college got over, he went to meet her. As he was waiting for her to come, his mind kept on asking several questions. While he was busy finding answers for all his questions she appeared out of the blue.

“Hey” she greeted him with her beaming smile

He was nervous, but the moment he saw her flashing a beaming smile it gave his heart a moment of peace. They started walking together. He took a deep breath after a while and said,

“I’m going for my college trip. I’m really sorry because I won’t be able to make it on your birthday.”

And it gave him immense peace of mind after blurting out what he had to say. But it came out at a wrong time. Her face drooped down, smile gone and her eyes turned moist. She stopped then and there, took some time to gulp down the truth.

“What???” she squeaked

“But how is that possible??? You said you will come back a day before my birthday??? Are you joking??? Tell me if you joking because it’s not funny at all.” She said at the top of her voice

He couldn’t say anything then, just nodded his head which made it clear that he was not coming on her birthday. The fact that she will have to spend her birthday alone in her hostel made him feel like as if someone has just strangle his neck with a thin wire. He felt suffocated.

There was an eerie silence everywhere. He didn’t know how to tackle such situations though he has faced a lot in his life, but here he was totally dumbstruck, clueless what to do.

He held her hand and said,

“I am really sorry…”

But she couldn’t gulp down this news and her face showed it well. He tried making small talks but in vain. He tried cheering her up but in vain. He was very confused he didn’t know what to do that might give her some peace. She was quiet and so he stayed mum too. They walked till the canteen, she took her seat and he went to order juice for both of them. When he came back, he saw her sobbing quietly. He kept his arm around her, she put her head down and said,

“I want to go back to my hostel. I want to be alone for a while.”

He didn’t say anything. He knew it was no point of arguing now. He was not answerable to anything. This was her first birthday with him but his college trip ruined the party.

She drank the juice in one gulp, got up and  said,

“Drop me to my hostel.”

He got up and started walking with her. She was still crying.

“I’m sorry that I’m behaving in a silly way but I don’t know why I’m not able to hold back my tears. I was not like this before. Why I have become like this??? Why???” she said

He kept a straight face listening to what she had to say. He thought that might give her some peace. But deep within he was afraid that what has not been said so far might just come out into the picture. He crossed his fingers.       

“I don’t want to like this. This is getting way too complicated for me. In past one month this has happened for the third time. This relation is giving me more pain than happiness. I don’t want to suffer like this anymore. I don’t want to be with you anymore…”

And the unsaid was said, he closed his eyes tried to gulp down his throat but it gave him a thud in his heart. Her words pierced his heart, he was feeling weak on his knees. He wanted to sit somewhere. It shattered him, somehow he tried holding back his tears when she said again,

“It’s not your mistake. It’s me who’s not able to cope up with the situation. You are a very selfless guy, it’s not your mistake. Now I am not able to cope up with such situations what will happen with me in future. I am such a foolish person that I accepted your proposal without even giving this a thought that, will I be able to handle the complications that will follow through lately.”

 Now that was enough for him to stay quiet.

“So you are saying you did a mistake. After all this while now you are giving up? And what for? Because I won’t be able to make it on your birthday. For this silly reason you will leave me.” He said

“I was not like this before. It’s not about my birthday anymore, it’s about my life. Why I should shed tears for something I didn’t even do???” she said

“As if I’m partying around. What do you think, I am very happy about all this?” he said

“Then even you should not suffer because of me. This is spoiling everything.” She said

He knew it was useless to argue with her at this point of time. He stayed quiet and walked with her till the gate of her hostel.

The moment they reached near the hostel gate, lightning struck, thunderbolts showered and it started raining heavily. He stood there as she was busy finding shade for herself. He stood there, closed his eyes and let himself get drown in those tiny droplets of rain which drenched him completely. He opened his eyes and a lone tear trickled down his face, which was washed away by the heavy downpour. She didn’t notice that. He looked into her eyes directly, her eyes were moist and so were his. He wanted to hug her tightly but couldn’t. He wanted to hold her in his arms and say sorry for everything. He wanted to see her beaming smile before leaving for his college trip. He knew if he will leave like this then her sunken face would haunt him forever. The guilt will remain forever. He looked up in the sky and asked God, why he was in such a situation where he was so helpless. Why the situation demanded his attention from both the sides when he couldn’t do anything about it. He was helpless and her emotional outburst didn’t make anything better for him.

He wanted to tell her that he loved her more than anything in this world. He wanted to tell her not to take any hurried decisions which might just ruin their peace of mind. He wanted to tell her many things. But in the light of the moment he couldn’t utter even a word. The rain didn’t stop nor did his heart stop crying. He sat down beside her under a tree. Whenever he tried to say anything his voice choked. Neither she said anything nor did he speak anything.

And when he gathered his will to speak his heart out she walked away from him. She walked away and disappeared inside her hostel gate. While she was walking back, silently his eyes followed her. That was the first time when she walked away from him without even looking back at him. His eyes were stucked to the hostel gate. He was still in the anticipation that she might come back to bid him goodbye. But she didn’t…

He kept on waiting for her to come back until it stopped raining. But when she didn’t, he kept his arms between his legs dipped his face down and he cried silently. The trees, the leaves started moving around as the wind gained its momentum. When the situation demanded her support she walked away from him. He felt lonely, he felt abandoned, he felt weak and he felt nauseated. He couldn’t believe what just happened. He couldn’t believe what his eyes just witnessed. And he couldn’t believe his fate which again switched its side.

He sat under the shade of the tree and cried his heart out quietly until the clock struck 9:00pm and the warden closed the hostel gate.

Those were his tears that he shed for her, and she wasn’t even there to wipe them up… 

Love - A Form Of Meditation...

Have you ever been in love? I am sure everyone has atleast at some point of their life. It doesn’t matter if, your love is still there in your life or not. Perhaps not or maybe yes. But that is not the point. So when you were in love, have you ever felt that when that person was beside you then the whole world ceased to exist? Or at that point of time, you don’t really care about how your friends treated you this morning, or why your boss was angry at you? Why the day didn’t go well? Everything ceases to exist right, apart from you and your love.

And when you hug that person do you find yourself in the most peaceful place, if such a place called no man’s land do exists? The way we live our life, seldom we get inner peace. We are not even happy from inside; just have a fake smile to avoid unnecessary questions. But when we hug the person we love and stay in their embrace the world seems to be beautiful. All our worries get dumped somewhere and all we care about is being in that embrace for a little longer always.

Or when you kiss that person, how does that makes you feel? Could you express? You may end up saying thousands of words which may not express your feeling completely but a kiss would certainly do. Sometimes we do feel to be isolated and not around many people. Similarly, a kiss would say many things which words couldn’t. Kissing the person you love gives you the inner happiness which we always long for. We all have a tight schedule and whole day we slog to get somewhere where we are not even pictured in our life. But we all do, because we all have some basic needs and fulfillments without which it’s hard to survive out here. Then who will have inner happiness because most of us are doing what the situation demands from us and not what we demand from our life. So we work whole day, till late at night and when we get back usually spank everyone at home because of the day’s frustration. Instead of that if we chose to make love to the person we love, we will definitely get the inner peace with inner happiness for what we are longing for. In life even in the nastiest of storm, we often seek for a glimpse of sunlight.

Love is a form of meditation when you have it you get your inner peace. Like how our blood pressure comes under control and we become immune to other diseases similarly love makes a person lively. We feel things in a different way, whichever way it might be it is beautiful. The feeling of being loved is beautiful. The feeling of being cared by someone is amazing. And that makes us do things in a very different way. But when they leave you, surely you will be disturbed. But then you always have a choice. Instead of thinking about when that person would leave us and living a life in that stress let’s see another side of the wall. Why don’t we think this way, that till the time he/she is there with me, I shall make the most of it?

P.S – Just a thought, I’m not sure whether it makes any sense or not.

Miracles do happen in Life...

Do you believe in miracles? Have you ever experienced something out of the box? Something which made you believe in the presence of some higher authority around you? That supreme power, which is sitting there and controlling us, even I never use to give it a thought. But then few days ago I happen to experience a series of events which actually changed my perspective towards it.

I am not an atheist nor am I a theist. My conscience always lies between faith and science. But there are certain mysterious things in this world which changes the course of someone’s lives. And when you are the one who’s witnessing it from a distance then nothing could be better than that.

Over past centuries and centuries, people tried hard to solve those riddles about life. But then not everything can be known to mankind. And when we are on the saturation level of discovery we start believing in something. Something very unpredictable, some name it as GOD, some gives scientific theory and some doesn’t believe in them at all. And this belief often leads us to something really good or maybe something really bad. That obviously depends on the choices that we make in your life.

I have known a guy since the beginning of my college, very unpredictable guy I tell you. We are done with our third year of college and placements are coming up which would decide the fate of many people. So this guy had a CGPA of 5.34 till previous semester with two back logs. In order to become eligible for placements one need to have minimum of 6.0 CGPA with no backlogs. So he had to do something out of the box this semester and come out with flying colors. Whole semester this guy had his own fun, most of the time he was stoned and didn’t care to attend the classes. His friends lost hope on him and they thought he won’t be able to make the cut. Being an observer I kept on doing my work from a distance and the good thing I liked about him was he never showed anyone about his problems. Always kept a smiling face, his family had a lot of expectations from him and he was not sure whether he will be able to fulfill them or not. He never told his parents about his situation. Every day he kept on motivating himself, that yes he can do it. In the back of his head there was always a question popping out every now and then. 

“What if I’m not eligible for placements? What will I do then? What will I tell to my family?”

And he never dared to answer them. He just kept a straight face and told himself that he’s a great finisher and he will make the cut this time, because he don’t have any other choice.

The whole semester passed by in a blink, he managed to cope up with the subjects and write his exams well enough to get good grades but his one paper in which he had backlog wasn’t satisfactory. He was scared that this might ruin the party. Then all his hopes would go in vain and he will lose his once chance which may be the deciding factor of his future.

He needed 7 GPA in the current semester and clears his backlogs. The vacation got over soon than we would have thought and seventh semester kicked off with great enthusiasm. There was something which made him out of the crowd and that was his self-belief. He believed that he has given his best shot and now everything lies in the hand of that supreme power.

Then one fine evening, when our results were announced he came running towards me and hugged me tightly. He said,

“I scored 7 pointers in this semester, cleared all my back logs. My CGPA just crossed 6.0 and I’m eligible for placements.”

If anyone else would have said that then I would have just gave him a nod. But the intensity in his voice was so much that I hugged him back. There was a hidden pain in his voice which he never showed to anyone and when he did what he believed that he would do, his happiness knew no bounds then. I never saw this guy so happy in past 3 years of my college life.

He continued,

“I can’t explain you how I am feeling now. I have never felt so light ever in my life so far. I am feeling as if someone has just removed the piles of stones from my head. And just wait and watch I will bag a job and shut their mouths completely who said that I will never make the cut.”

“All the best man.” I said

I wished him good luck and walked away. I needed sometime alone to think about his experience. Wow! I reflected. Now that was something, miracle really? I mean do I have to believe in that now. Not that I doubt his caliber, he has more potential and he can score more easily. But the series of events that happened so far leaves me with no other choice than to believe in the fact that sometimes in life, miracles do happen.

All we have to do is, keep believing in ourselves and give our best shot as if it is our last. Keep on pumping the positivity inside you and it will reflect around you. There were many people who scored 9 pointers, 9.8 pointers but I only looked at this guy. People who top the university have a habit of doing that only. They have never faced failure in life, and they don’t have the courage to withstand the storm that may hit them in coming future. And needless to say if they were in his position they will never have made the cut.

“One who believes in himself can make the world go round.”  

The day is not too far

It was 11:00pm at night; she was tired more than usual and felt sick. She decided to take a nap. As she lay down on her bed, closed her eyes she felt pukish. She got up quickly rushed to the washroom and puked her lungs out in the sink. It was the start of her third month of pregnancy and the whole pukish thing has become so common for her now that she didn’t become restless at all. She washed her face and came back to her room, sat on her bed and opened her diary where she has jotted down few names for her child. She always wanted to have a baby girl but then her mind drifted to all those incidents which happened last year in our country gave her chill down her spine and sweat beads on her forehead.

Lately the condition of female fraternity had been really bad in our country. In broad day light such in human rape cases have come into the picture and the culprits are escaping freely given the fact that we have a very diplomatic society and a corrupted system. Her blood pressure shot up for a while and that made her more paranoid with every passing second. She closed her diary, put it aside, switched off the light pulled up her quilt and drifted into a deep slumber.

And she saw a dream…

5 years later…

She was residing in Delhi with her husband and her 5 year cute daughter Vidya. Vidya was the prettiest girl in her family with green contrasting eyes, doll like face and her exquisite features made her look adorable. Vidya was a jovial girl who loved to play around all the time. Watching her play like that her mother felt more satisfied. She saw her own shadow in Vidya and that gave her immense happiness. One day Vidya came back from her school and she was crying. When she saw her mother she hugged her tightly and cried her heart out. Her mother could feel that Vidya was shivering. In fact she was terrified.

“What happened honey?”

But she kept on crying. Vidya was taken back into her room and her mother tried to make her sleep. Once she was sleep, her mother got up and enquired in Vidya’s school about her sudden outburst. No one had a clue what she was talking about. After a while when she came back to Vidya’s room, she was shocked to see blood coming out from Vidya’s thigh. She quickly took a towel and pulled her frock up and then the sky fell over her head and land escaped from beneath. The blood was dripping down from Vidya’s vagina. Vidya’s mother felt weak on her knees and fell down, tears made their way out of her eyes piercing her heart. She yelled, she cried and she screamed that made Vidya awake. And then Vidya narrated what happened while she was coming back from her school.

Her school got over at 3:00pm and she boarded her school bus. The school bus dropped her off at her usual bus stop where a stranger who must be 40 years of age offered Vidya some chocolates. Being a 5 year old kid she jumped out with joy. The stranger then told her that he will drop her home in his car and then the thought of going home by a car made her more excited and her happiness then knew no bounds. They got into the car and after a while the stranger stopped the car in a deserted area, tied Vidya with the seat belt and raped her brutally. Vidya who was not even aware what rape meant couldn’t react and her pain was suppressed into cry. Once she was dropped near her house she ran upstairs and hugged her mother.

And she woke up with a jerk, checked her watch which said 4:00am. She gulped down a glass of water and being terrified by the dream she waited for the sun to come out. She took bath and left for the hospital at around 11:00am. After reaching the hospital she immediately rushed to her doctor and said,

“I want to abort this child. I don’t want to give birth to my child who will be abused, molested and raped in our society later on in her life.”

The condition of our country is same and if nothing is done now to stop such inhuman acts then that day is not too far when people won’t be ready to give birth to a girl only because they are scared that their daughter will face the same things in life what Damini, Nirbhaya and other victims faced. Have our conscience died within us? Who will fight for these victims? Our diplomatic society? Or the corrupted government? If we want to see a change around us, it’s us who will have to take the charge of bringing a change in our society, in our system. This is a waking call for all of us, if not now then probably never.